2013 Goal

I am a poor goal setter. It is a genuine character flaw of mine. And I didn’t even realize it – or learn about it – until about 4 years ago when my daughters were learning about goal setting. (By sending my kids to a great school, I’ve learned a lot myself!)

Anyway, I’ve read that poor goal setting is often attached to fear or believing you are undeserving. After watching a daughter struggle in the same ways I do, I’ve determined that “fear of failure” sounds very obscure. But avoiding creating goals to avoid failing at them, thus letting myself and those around me down, is something I can completely wrap my head around. I’m not scared of failing, I’m too damn stubborn to fail, but I am also stubborn enough and smart enough to find ways of avoiding putting myself in a position in which I can fail in the first place!

So… let’s talk about exercise and fitness for a moment, because I often do. I don’t have a running goal. I have no desire to run a half marathon or full marathon. Even 6 miles doesn’t interest me much. Is that because I am avoiding giving myself a goal which I might fail at? Possibly. Or it could be because it sounds like the ultimate torture to me. So, as I put in my last post, I found a fitness challenge that DOES interest me at a Barre Fitness gym.

The challenge involves 24 classes in one month. That’s measurable and almost too easy. But it doesn’t ring with “2013 Goal” glory, because it will be over after one month.

But I found something that DOES sound like a good goal for me.

And now I digress…

… a few years ago when skinny jeans in dark denim became the style, they looked great on my 11 year old daughter. It never occurred to me wear them. I don’t try to dress like my teens.

Then the cobalt blue and bright red skinny jeans hit the market, and suddenly they were great for adults. I tried some on one day when I was feeling gutsy at Target, but they did not fit my calves. I basically took that as a sign, and decided they just weren’t for my figure. But lately I’ve been pretty proud of my figure. I work hard for it. I am not super skinny, and I don’t think I am meant to be. I am curvy but healthy, which is appropriate for a woman of child-bearing age who eats the occasional chocolate bar or pizza.

Her outfit worth coveting

Then I saw this mom at school. She came into a meeting looking fun and funky. She had burgundy skinny jeans on, which I later learned were “bordeaux” color, with a taupe silky top and beautiful, suede, platform, lace-up taupe ankle boots. I complemented her outfit, and she told me the jeans were from “Off Fifth”, the Sax Fifth Avenue outlet store.

Now, this mom is a toothpick. She dressed as Axl Rose for an ’80s dance once and totally pulled it off. So I knew the same brand wouldn’t fit me, but the bordeaux/merlot denim idea stuck in my head. How pretty for fall and winter!

While in St. Louis for Christmas, we were shopping at Target one day last week, and I noticed they now had wine colored jeans too! I thought maybe they’d fit me in a Fit 4. That night (wow, long story longer…) I was at my Aunt’s house for dinner and I mentioned wanting to try on the wine colored skinny jeans at Target.

“What if they had a pattern?” She asked.

“These were solid. I think I’d be OK with a pattern if they were tone-on-tone.” I said, “but not like those floral ’80s-looking ones the kids are wearing.”

“Come see these jeans I just bought. If they fit you, you can have them,” she said.

And I followed my aunt into her spare bedroom, where, hanging in the closet, were the Elle skinny jeans she just bought for herself at Kohl’s on sale. They were purple and black animal print. In the dim light of evening they looked wine color, but since they were actually purple they matched the purple high-low cardigan I had perfectly. Bonus! I tried them on – and they fit great! I was a bit skeptical at first, asking my aunt over and over if she thought I could get away with wearing them.

“You need to stop thinking of them as jeans, and instead think of them as leggings.” She said.

I knew the ultimate test was wearing them for my daughters. The next night we were having an extended-family dinner at my sister-in-law’s house. I decided to wear the new jeans with a black long-sleeve T-shirt, the matching purple cardigan, and my black leather heeled boots. I put on the whole outfit, showed my 14 year old, and she said, “They make your butt look good.” And the 15 year old said, “Cute!”

So I was in the clear. And the cardigan gave me just enough coverage to be brave. And halfway through the night, when we were all around the fireplace and toasty, I even dared to take the cardigan off! (I was missing a belt, though, because I hadn’t planned to wear this outfit when I packed my suitcase.)

And there you have it. My first foray into skinny jeans! And a new goal – for those skinny jeans to fit every time I put them on in 2013. Even if it’s a “fat day” or “PMS” day. As long as they fit, I’ll smile, because I’ll have successfully achieved my real, solid, measurable goal.

2 Replies to “2013 Goal”

  1. Kat says:

    I love the ones from Old Navy!

  2. Lindsay says:

    So cute!! Glad you gave it another shot.

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